Q: My friends complain that I’m too shy. They think I should go out drinking with them. What should I do?
X Responds: The answer is simple, it’s only one word: “NO”. Being shy is not your fault and that should not influence you to go out and drink with your so called “friends.” If they were your real friends, then they would try and protect you from these kind of things. Real friends would try to help you break out of your shell one step at a time.
If you’re trying to overcome your shyness, you should take it slowly. Remember that becoming confident will take practice. You can start by being self-aware. You may feel shy or nervous all the time in large social situations. Start to analyze what makes you cautious. Knowing what causes your shyness will help you get over it faster. Not only should you focus on what you need to improve, but also think about your strengths too. Once you realize what you’re good at, work on those skills even more. Understand that no one is perfect. Don’t let frustration impact your self-esteem. Keep in mind that failure and self-consciousness are part of the learning process.
Last but not least, be yourself! You do not have to be the most outgoing, spontaneous person that someone could ever meet. Express yourself even if it’s in a way that is quiet. Don’t force yourself to be comfortable and confident in every situation. Your self-esteem is the most important tool to boost confidence. I hope you realize that shyness is not a personality–it’s just an obstacle that you can definitely overcome!
Q: What is an easy way to bring up your test grade?
Y replies: Unfortunately, once test grades get graded, they are usually final, but definitely don’t lose hope! There are a lot of teachers in this school who are willing to give test corrections after a particularly bad test, and this helps your grade a lot because in these cases, they end up giving back half a point for every question you answer correctly. However, for teachers who do not offer this as an alternative, there are still various ways that you can bring up your overall grade.
For example, extra credit! Never flake on extra-credit if a teacher offers it—it is only meant to help you in the long run. In addition, doing simple things to ensure that your grade isn’t slipping will definitely help get you an easy 100 in every other category of your overall average. Also, make sure to always complete your homework assignments and classwork. This is a big must in every class, because if a teacher is seeing you put effort into their class, then they’ll want to put more effort into helping improve your grade. And, just showing up to class is obviously important. Because although there may be days when spending a period hanging out with friends seems a lot more appealing than going to English class, that class period will be taken into account when the 0 goes down into your grade sheet.
Overall, it’s important to remember that one bad test score does not determine your level of intelligence. There are bound to be moments in life when you don’t do so well, regardless of how hard you tried. That’s just the way life is. It throws curveballs at you from left and right to see how you deal with it. Coping with little setbacks helps you keep going when you confront the next obstacle in life.
Q: I really like this boy but I don’t know how to approach him. Should I give up or try to talk to him?
Z suggests: You should definitely go for it and just try to talk to him! I know it’s bound to be nerve wracking having to muster up courage to approach someone when you know how you feel for them inside, but you have to keep a level of cool about you. If you don’t just go for it now, you’ll always end up questioning yourself thinking how it might have ended up if you just took the chance. So forget the risks for now and just take the fall. See where it takes you. If it goes well, then you may have gotten someone special out of it and if not, then the important thing is that you tried. Now you won’t regret not putting yourself out there.